Finding Perspective.

Both my parents worked throughout my childhood.  They were out of the house by 7am and usually didn’t come home until 10pm at night. I developed my work ethic by watching them.  My mom would get called to the emergency room at all hours of the day.  I spent a lot of time hanging out with the emergency room nurses waiting for my mom to take care of something.  I was basically raised by a woman I called “Lola” but she was not actually my grandmother but rather a nanny from the Philippines. My first language was Tagalog because that what “Lola” spoke.  She was 4’ 6” tall but could probably wrestle battle an ox in her prime. I loved her dearly like I do my parents.

Now, here is a tightly held secret.  Ok, not really.  My nickname as a child was “Joel”.  My dad and I have the same first name so somewhere along the lines they started calling me “Joel”.  I have no idea where the name came from and neither do my parents.  Upon moving to California after college, I decided to just stick with my legal name “Renato” after a work colleague suggested it.  The east coast knows me as “Joel” and the west coast knows me as “Renato”.  At my wedding, half the attendees were there for “Renato & Sarah’s Wedding” and the other half was there for “Joel & Sarah’s Wedding”. To this day, I respond to both names!

Well, my Lola spoke very little English even as I grew up into my teens.  My friends would come over asking for me and my Lola would provide short answers and close the door.  For example,

• “Joel School” — I was at school

• “Joel Work” — I was working in my parents office

• “Joel Gym” — I was working out

• “Joel Eat” — I was out grabbing food

• “Joel Girl” — I was out with my girlfriend at the time she didn’t like. 

Fast forward, I went with my friends to the Grateful Dead concerts at the Meadowlands in New Jersey.  A buddy of mine came to the door and my Lola responded “Joel Dead” and slammed the door.  Well, needless to say my buddy freaked out and this was before cell phones.  I’m sure I must have been dead to him for most of that day until I got back from the show. 

Alas, Joel is not actually dead but the story does remind us about the importance of perspectives.  Lola just wanted to provide information on where I was.  My buddy just wanted to know where I was.  Joel just wanted to listen to some jamming music.  Referring to myself in the 3rd person felt appropriate right there.

Gaining perspective is a crucial element in both life and business.  It allows us to see situations from different angles, leading to more informed and balanced decision making. Perspective isn’t something we’re born with; it’s developed over time through experiences, challenges, and by actively seeking to understand viewpoints that differ from our own. Whether it’s through travel, reading, or engaging in meaningful conversations with people from diverse backgrounds, each of these activities enriches our understanding of the world. In business, having a broad perspective can lead to innovative solutions and help navigate complex challenges with a clearer vision.

All that being said, having a strategic perspective is incredibly challenging because it requires the ability to step back from immediate concerns and view the broader landscape, often in a highly complex and rapidly changing environment. This means looking beyond day-to-day operations to consider long-term goals, potential risks, and emerging opportunities. However, the difficulty lies in balancing this long-term vision with the urgent demands of the present. We are often so focused on immediate tasks and short-term results that it becomes difficult to shift our mindset to a more strategic level. Additionally, the uncertainty of the future and the vast amount of information that must be processed and interpreted to make strategic decisions can be overwhelming. As a result, maintaining a strategic perspective requires discipline, focus, and the ability to anticipate and adapt to change—a skill set that is not easily mastered but is essential for sustained success.

Now, lets apply some perspective to my life in the form of a time line backwards and forward from 2024.  I started 29 years ago at my high school and moved forward 29 years into the future. This is what I came up with.

1995 (29 years ago)

Graduated from Fairfield College Preparatory School

1997 (27 years ago)

First coding job at Lockheed Martin LMS in Tarrytown, NY

1999 (25 years ago)

Graduated from the University of Richmond 

2003 (21 years ago)

Sarah and I get married in California

2006 (18 years ago)

Molly was born 

2010 (14 years ago)

Brooklyn was born 

2020 (4 years ago)

Moved to Park City, Utah

There is Life Outside of the Bay Area (Part #1)
There is Life Outside of the Bay Area (Part #2)
There is Life Outside of the Bay Area (Part #3)
There is Life Outside of the Bay Area (Part #4)

2021 (3 years ago)

Experience life changing stroke

Surviving a Stroke
Surviving a Stroke: Recovery
Surviving a Stroke: Returning to Life

2023 (1 year ago)

Gave up booze

Dear Booze, Its me, not you.

2028 (+4 years)

Brooklyn Graduates High School, Molly Graduates College

Raising Amazing Daughters. Proud Dad.

2032 (+8 years)

Brooklyn Graduates College

2033 (+9 years)

Sarah and Renato married 30 years

2039 (+15 years)

Average retirement age and social security eligibility

2043 (+19 years)

Sarah and Renato married 40 years 

2044 (+20 years)

Average life expectancy of Filipino male (67 years old)

2051 (+27 years)

Average life expectancy of American male (74.8 years old)

2053 (+29 years)

Sarah and Renato married 50 years

The timeline provides a unique perspective on my life.

• Life is short and moves fast.

• My wife Sarah is my most consistent passenger with me on this ride.

• I have more years behind me than ahead of me.

• Family and friends are things that hold the test of time.

• Physical belongings fad away into the background. 

Perspective helps with finding joy because in the bigger picture, so many things we worry about are irrelevant and we have so many more things to be grateful for.  Don’t waste a minute. Live life to the fullest. Find your joy. Make a dent in the universe.

Thanks for reading.  I hope you enjoyed!

-rjm